Looking back

Over this past week, I found myself going through some old pictures, and I stumbled across some from a really long time ago. At least it feels that way. I can't remember the year exactly, but Sihing Csillag was a purple belt in the Lil Leopards, and there were so me other faces that I recognize.

It's amazing how far we have all come. I was still a Sihing in those pictures, and that feels like a lifetime ago. In reality it's been only 7 or 8 years, but again, it seems like so long ago.

It was a nice trip down memory lane. Seeing all the changes that the Kwoon has gone throughout ugh ( still only had the original space, and those amazing red mats), and of course all of the changes that we have gone through. Due to injuries and a little bit of aging, I cannot train the way I used to. But that's ok, as our paths are always adapting, or veering off in a different direction, and while each of our journeys are our own, ultimately we are not alone.

We have each other to encourage and support, to help us adapt to each change that comes our way. It's been a great year in the I Ho Chuan, and I look forward to what comes next year. I have seen momentous growth in everyone, and I hope that you all keep on the path you are on.

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Family

I was struck this past Saturday at open training just how blessed we are. Looking at the families that train there together made me smile. I know that not all of our family members stay with it, and that's ok because I know that they did benefit even if they don't know it.

I am fortunate, that my family trains at Silent River Kung Fu. My girls, like so many other kids, have grown up in this environment and know it as a second home. We are a huge family, that cares about each other beyond measure. Together we embark on projects that tie us closer to one another, and projects that make the school more "ours".

I feel truly blessed to share my journey with you. This past year has been full of growth, and I am looking forward to what the next year brings.

Peace, love and happiness to you all.

 

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Jammie's and tea

How can I be mindful when I feel I am going crazy? I have finally jumped into my full time position, which is good as I can narrow my focus at work. And my boss has been away last week and this week, so I am learning a lot on the fly. Not a bad thing, but it's proving to be a bit stressful. I made some wonderful tea for my coffee break today with the intent of drinking it slowly. But it was gone before I really realized it. Absolutely no mindfulness there! Oh well. I just have to recognize where I am and stop and breathe. Once I gain more confidence, I should be able to focus more on my tea. I have also become aware of how much I march at work. I am always on a mission, and while it's good for my numbers, it isn't good for being in the moment.

I know that I am feeling a lot of stress right now, and probably more than I realize. My weekend was spent in bed with a migraine, and I had a cold sore last week. And I don't get those very often. Don't get me wrong, I am not complaining. I'm just taking stock of where I am mentally. I need a little bit of time off, which is coming soon. And as long as I don't fill all of my time with the things I want to get done, I should be able to relax a bit. And I plan on drinking lots of tea! Mmmmm, jammie's and tea. Sounds wonderful.

 

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I hope this works

I was on a website tonight doing some very late Christmas shopping(oops!) and came across the following page. I hope the link works.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/danish-police-officer-syrian-refugee_55f8d9d3e4b0b48f67013caf

Anyway, if it doesn't, it's a touching look at a Danish police officer and a little girl fleeing from Syria. Is him playing a game with her, and she looks happy. It brought tears to my eyes. Everyday is a barrage of bad things - things that make me want to stay inside with the people I love and not go out into that scary world. Where people take the lives of others, or abuse them, and a world where countries seem to think that the path to peace is through violence. Sorry, I kind of went off there.

It was good for my soul to see such a touching moment captured in time. I hope the link works...

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A short one

I was reflecting tonight, and it is wonderful to be around so many like minded people. It's like being home. It's always an amazing feeling to share experiences with my fellow students. The demo Saturday was fantastic and left me with a warm feeling. This crane project is doing much more for me emotionally than I expected. I feel it has brought us together more on a more mental level, and has also given me a new reason to celebrate everyone. That sounds cheesy, but it's true. With every crane that I string, I feel the presence of someone unique. We all have things we are good at, and things that we need to work on. We have different ways of doing things to achieve the same goal. We are individuals moving towards a common goal on different paths. (My apologies if this is not very coherent, just my thoughts moving around in my head.)

 

 

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Cranes for peace

I started folding cranes many years ago. We had a 1000 crane project back then and folding them is something that stuck with me. Folding cranes made me feel peaceful while I worked. The process of emptying my mind, and focusing on just that one thing soothed my soul, and relieved stress.

This project speaks to me on a few levels. First, the sense of peace within. How do we spread peace if we don't feel it inside? An important phrase in our kwoon is Lu Ping An - walking in peace and harmony. For me, it means that when my body and soul feel peace, then it will spread from me to the people around me, and then to the world. Peace for all beings, for all plants. I don't always feel peaceful, but folding cranes provides me with a great tool to achieve that.

This project also speaks to me as a way to show the world that the way to peace isn't with fighting or hurting each other, or condemning each other. It's a non verbal way of expressing my values.

If you aren't familiar with the story of Sadako Sasaki I encourage you to read it. Basically, this project of folding 1000 started with her. An atomic bomb was dropped in Hiroshima in 1945 when she was 2 years old. Years later, at the age of 12 she became sick with leukemia. A result of all of the lingering radiation. According to Japanese legend, a person who folds 1000 cranes will be granted a wish. Her wish was for world peace. And so is mine.

I want to thank those of you who have been folding cranes, and we will get to our goal soon. I estimate about 300 at is point, and will have them hanging in the school.

 

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Always a lesson

Everyday I learn something. It might not be something big, but there is always something.

It was pointed out to me today that a technique that I have been teaching isn't what it should be. I thought, holy crap! How long have I been doing that? It more than likely started as a tool to fix something, but quickly became a comfortable change, and therefore changed the technique for me. Yikes. How easy it is to develop a bad habit! Thankfully, it was pointed out to me, so I can now correct it.

Earning a black belt isn't the end. In fact, I think that's where it all really begins. I learn everyday. It might be insights into my reactions, or thought processes, or it might be a different way of doing things. At any rate. No matter where I am, or what I am doing, there is always a lesson.

Sorry if this doesn't flow well. I didn't expect this post to really go this direction...:-)

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Thinking

I have been thinking about the state of my training lately. I am very aware of my limitations and while they frustrate me sometimes, I have learned to make the best of them. And I think a lot of my growth this past year, has been more mental than physical. But I think most of it stems from moving meditation. In other words, Tai Chi. And reflecting now, i have had a few periods this year where my mental state really needed it. I chose the Tai Chi short form for my 1000 reps, and I think it was a good choice.

I started learning Tai Chi about a month after I earned my black belt, and it was instrumental in healing my ankle. (Which broke 4 weeks before). It has been a tool to build the small muscles, and it's a tool which tells me when my ankle is weak. Like Sifu Dennis says, Tai Chi will remind you of all of your old injuries. Not because it's doing damage, but because it points out all of the weak small muscles.

Tai Chi balances out my psyche, and balances my body. It allows me to focus on my chi, and to become more sensitive to it. (And maybe one day I can be an air bender! Lol).

Tai Chi is the grand ultimate fist.

 

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In the moment and things

I have had some lessons this past while about being in the moment. There are many times, where there is somewhere else we would rather be. But having that mindset, can set us up for disappointment, stress, and eventually resentment.

I have been reminded that its important to make the best of where we are. There are many hidden gems in, every situation. Be it good, or sad, or difficult. Taking the time to appreciate where we are, and who we are with, are I think, the key to happiness.

I know I am blessed to be surrounded by people on a similar journey, who share similar values. I wouldn't be where I am today, or the person I am today without that appreciation.

I have been practicing moving meditation a lot over the years, and have not been as successful with sitting meditation. But I think I am ready to start.

Thank you to everyone at Silent River Kung Fu. For being a second family, and providing a caring, compassionate environment for me and my children to grow. I truly appreciate every one of you.

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Another one behind us

We just finished our annual Tiger Challenge on the weekend, and as always, I came away learning more. I learn about things that can help me teach better, things that can help me be a better judge next year, and things that I can do to help my training.

The tournament gives gives us an opportunity to set a definitive goal, and to set in motion a plan to achieve it. It narrows our focus, and allows us to strive to be better today than yesterday.

I watched competitors fight their nerves, and get through a whole form. No matter the outcome, they were a success. It's hard to beat that anxiety and stress of putting yourself out there. I am so proud of all of you!

 

 

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Noodle, don't noodle

 

I think I am going to start this with the more negative aspects of my training, and work to the positive.

I have had numerous injuries over the years, as most of us have and I thought that I should share a few as they offer insight into my restrictions. I had several ribs broken as a blue belt. And the way they healed have kept me from doing push-ups for many, many years. Happy to say that they feel good now though! I have also had chronic tendinitis in my wrists for years. I have a good month or two and then a few bad months so depending on how they feel, consistency can be hard. I broke my ankle almost 7 years ago just before my black belt ceremony, which still gives me grief more often than not. Injuries have the power to focus our training, as well as to help us appreciate what we can do.

When I started my I Ho Chuan year, I could do 10 knee/ knuckle push-ups at a time. That was it. As of September, I could do 20 at a time fairly easily. But then in a sick twist of fate, I think I cracked a knuckle on my left hand. And it still hurts. Poor me right? Ha ha. So, the squat thrust challenge has been just that, a challenge, Oh well. There isn't any point in complaining as it is what it is.

The past few weeks, I have been face to face with using empathy and compassion. And sometimes it's been really hard to do. One of my cats requires daily medication as of a month ago. And she is extremely fussy about her food so hiding it isn't an option. I think I have pretty much tried everything, but have had to hug her tight and force the pill down her throat. I hate doing it, and she hates me for it. She hides when she knows it's time, and I have lost my temper a few times. Not my best pet mommy moment. But I have been really trying to see it with compassion and empathy. Of course she hates it. It sucks having someone force your mouth open and then hold it until the pill is gone. She can't understand how the pills make her feel better, so her reaction is understandable. And I have learned a lot about myself through this experience.

My training has its ebbs and flows, and I have learned to roll with them as best as I can. I get frustrated, and sometimes I don't feel that I deserve the belt around my waist. But I keep moving forward. I see the benefits of journaling and how mental training is just as important as physical.

 

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Happy Thanksgiving

 

Have a great thanksgiving everyone. I am blessed to be surrounded by people I love and care about, and am thankful for all that I have.

 

 

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Terrific!

It was great to see everyone at the meeting on Saturday. I found it to be inspiring and it left me feeling motivated. It reminded me to look back at where I started, and reflect on the journey so far. I've been training for 12.5 years or so, which isn't very long and I know there is a lot more for me to learn. I see where I have been, and I know where I want to go - it's just a matter of the journey. And that journey evolves as I travel. I need to keep moving forward and to see the valleys and peaks as challenges that will help me grow. Thanks to all of you that shared your progress this weekend, and thanks to everyone for being on this journey. It would be much more difficult without you.

 

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In the balance

Finding balance between Kung Fu, family and work can be a struggle. Events that are out of our control happen and we can easily find ourselves lost in the confusion. And it can really difficult to re-establish our carefully crafted balance. But it's doable.

There are always bumps in the road, and our paths can lead sideways, or go in circles. I think that when we have been training enough to develop effortless effort, it is a whole lot easier to find the right path again.

I have been thinking about my journey this year, and am pondering joining the I Ho Chuan team next year. This has been a great year so far, and for the most part have been able to maintain balance in my life, and the many roles I play.

 

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How much do I say?

I had a lot of emotions going through me today, and I thought I had a blog, but now I am not so sure. I guess i still have one, but I don't think I can share all of those emotions anymore. (But here's a few).

I have a lot of work ahead of me, when it comes to being a better person. I am working on using more right speech, and to hold back on the labels that are so easy to put on a person. I want to be able to use compassion all of the time, and to be a better person today than I was yesterday. And I want to be more like my mom was.

She was someone who always gave of herself, and put others first. She always had a smile, and could make anyone feel cared for. If she gave you a hug, it was full of love, and could make everything better. She managed to touch people near and far, and had many friends that she had never met. She was also quick to forgive and forget.

My point I guess, is that life is too short, and I want to spend the rest of my life working at being a better person. I need to get better at smiling at my anger and accepting it, because then I can let it go. I need to get better at showing those I love how much I appreciate them, and how blessed I am to have them in my life. I want to share Kung Fu, as it is such a huge gift to have been given. I want my children to be loving, caring people who make a positive change. But it all starts with me, and how I choose to live each day.

 

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It started with no shoes

I work downtown, and when I leave the building at lunch, I enjoy people watching. We wonder where they are off to, marvel at the interesting outfits, and smile at the busyness. However, one day last week, a man strolled by, and it took a few seconds to realize that he wasn't wearing shoes. That started a conversation about the homeless/ or less fortunate, and what is out there for help, but really it's not about just giving someone shoes, or clothes to help them stay warm(although that does help). It boils down to mental illness, a lack of resources, and the stigma that surrounds it.

We had the opportunity to perform a lion dance for the Rotary Run for Life yesterday. Each year it is a blessing to be able to support the suicide prevention program in our community. We need to be brave enough to ask if someone is suicidal, and we need to be strong enough to help ourselves and others get past the stigma.

So how do we get past the stigma? The first step, is to learn more and to talk about it. Talk about it until you are comfortable with it. Mental illness affects more people than we can imagine, but it's invisible, so it's easy to ignore. But I know, that with empathy and compassion, we can make a difference.

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I'm not complaining

I have to start this with an apology. I am really sorry team, but I just cannot do the dragon dance. My little stint in it last class has been bad for my ankle ever since. It stinks, because it was fun. But I can still Buddha!

It has been a stressful week, and it will slowly lighten up, so that's a good thing. It just makes it a little more difficult to stay in the moment, and it is tiring to be on high alert constantly. But this too shall pass.

I am looking forward to classes starting up again, and getting back into that groove. Funny since it's only been a week, but it feels like a really long time. Anyway, thanks to everyone who contributed to the renos, and to those who supported it! It looks fantastic!

See you all on the mats...

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Fresh start

Everything year at this time we have the opportunity to have a fresh start. We close the kwoon for a week, do that we may put things back in order, clean things really well, and out our own selves into the place that we train. It's a humbling experience, and a blessing to do so with all of the other students.

It's also a new start for the kids going back to school. For some, it's going back to your friends in the same surroundings as last year, and the. For others it's strife with anxiety as they enter a whole new school.

No matter what, when you wake up each day, try to remember that it's a brand new day, with a whole new start. Put on a smile, take a deep breath, and it will all come together. Yes, it can be tough, but know that you are tougher than what the new start will bring.

Our attitude sets the stage for things to come.

 

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A lesson learned

Oh, where to start. I had a blog written in my head as I was trying to sleep on Friday night, but alas, it's gone now. I waited too long, and maybe next time I should just get up and write my thoughts down before they sail away.

Anyway, I hope I can articulate my thoughts here. I had the opportunity to attend a Gossip and Slander seminar thing at work on Friday and it was better than I expected. ( I call it a seminar thing because I think it was supposed to be a workshop, but it was more of a talk than anything). I dint have any expectations when I went in, and sometimes that's the best way to experience something. You don't have any preconceived notions or opinions to interfere. You have an open mind, and that is a wonderful thing.

One of the points the speaker said, was that every day, every moment we are changing the world around us. It might be good or bad, but it's happening whether we are aware or not. He also mentioned that we have a tendency to label people, and we forget that they have names and are special to someone. Who are we to minimize that?

This talk really got me thinking about our acts of kindness and the impact they really have. It's a small positive difference, but it is twofold. The receiver feels good, and the giver feels even better. One small thing, can change the world. And another thing, is just how big of an impact our words can leave. Good or bad. I am going to leave you with Socrates Test of Three.

Legend says that one day the great philosopher came upon a young man who ran up to him excitedly and said:

"Socrates, do you know what I heard about one of your students?"

"Wait a moment," Socrates replied. "Before you tell me I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Test of Three."

"Test of three?"

"That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my student let's take a moment to test what you're going to say. The first test of is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"

"No," said the man. "Actually I just heard about it."

"Alright," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second test, the test of goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my student something good?"

"No, on the contrary..."

So," Socrates continued. "You want to tell me something bad about him even though you're not certain it's true?"

The man shrugged, a little embarrassed.

Socrates continued." You may still pass though, because there is a third test - the test of usefulness. Is what you are about to tell me about my student going to be useful to me?"

"No, not really."

"Well " concluded Socrates, if what you want to tell me is neither true, nor good, nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?"

The man was defeated and ashamed, left.

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Back to square one

I had the pleasure Friday night of having my 3 year old nephew over for a sleepover. It's been a while since mine were that young, and I didn't realize how much my family has evolved over the years. He was into everything when I thought we had "child-proofed" my place. Definitely an eye opener for me. But don't get me wrong, I loved having him over, and will do it again.

This brought me back to my training. Sometimes I forget what being a white belt was like. Everything is new and exciting, and there is so much to learn. Now, I mostly find myself focussing with my eye for detail, on the minute things, and forget what it was like to start fresh. It's a completely different mentality now than as a white belt.

There are so many techniques that I take for granted. I don't have to think about them, I just do. I need to find a way to keep that white belt frame of mind in front of me more often. Learning Kung Fu is a gift, and an even bigger one is learning at Silent River. The best second family ever! And the cool thing is, that family is always evolving too. With promotions, and new faces, it's a place that I take comfort in, and I appreciate all those who enter.

 

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Time

Finding the balance between, work, family, Kung Fu and me time, can be challenging sometimes. Only sometimes though, as me time tends to include Kung Fu and family. It's interesting how Kung fu is both something we share as a family, and it's also something just for me.

I am on my own unique journey, and yet I share it with my family and my Kung Fu family, so I am never alone. I am blessed to be where I am right now, and to have so many like minded and amazing people around me. If I look back to when I first started, I didn't imagine where my life would lead, or how much it would change for the better.

I have ups and downs, as we all do, or maybe it's more like hills and valleys, and finding that straight line can be hard at times. But the key is to never give up, reach out for support, and smile at your heart as often as you can.

Have you ever sat on the grass, closed your eyes with your face at the sky, and just felt the sun shining it's warmth on you? For me, that makes me smile, inside and out. It feels like a warm embrace, which helps me find my centre, and to move forward.

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Warm fuzzier and such

Saturday was really great. The energy from the crowd at the parade was very positive, and then the time together at Mr. Duncan's was truly great. I'm not usually one for big get together's, but this was very comfortable for me. You guys are awesome..

I do however, need to learn more about anxiety and the need to keep it front of me all the time. It can very easily turn your thoughts into a runaway train, which is very difficult to stop. Triggers aren't necessarily explainable, and putting those thoughts into words can be really hard. Then guilt can creep in, because a person may be very aware that their response doesn't make sense, but yet they can't control it. It then becomes a cycle, that has to run its course until the pressure dissipates, and things slow down again.

Dealing with someone who suffers from anxiety requires compassion and empathy. We need to remind ourselves that for the person with anxiety, it's a challenge they are faced with everyday. It's a mental illness and we need to have their trust that we aren't passing judgment. That it's ok, and we support them.

I think that at SRKF, we have an environment that supports those with anxiety, so it's a very safe place to try to push yourself without any consequences.

 

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What am I?

What is a martial artist? It is someone who understands mastery is the journey itself, not its destination. A martial artist is someone whose values reflect that of their journey, and who is accountable for their actions. One core value is empathy. Understanding your opponent and the surroundings. Making decisions that are based in compassion, and using that compassion to breed more empathy in those around us. Another value is the eye for detail. Recognizing the small intricacies that need improvement, and not accepting mediocrity. A martial artist has passion, that is reflected in their soul. It shines, and inspires. They have discipline which is evident in their successes and their failures. But failure, is simply the process to success. With discipline comes consistent effort, which will become success at some point. A martial artist is someone who is a leader, whether it's by example or through their charisma. A martial artist values humility. The recognition that one always has room for improvement, and someone who can see the lessons in front of them.

 

I am not a martial artist yet, but am on that path. I have yet to achieve mastery, but will always reach for that goal.

 

As a mother on the path to mastery, I lead by example for my children, and through charisma. They see my actions, and through those actions, I can teach them to be the best they can be.

 

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It's mine

I'd like to thank everyone who gave me support and encouragement a little while ago. It helped a lot in taking the step and going through with the interview process for the job I applied for.

It was officially offered to me on Friday, and I accepted. That in itself felt strange. It's not something I really ever thought would happen. I mean, at first I applied more to see what would happen, and then when I got the interview, I almost cancelled. It wasn't until I was told that I was being considered that I realized I had made it, and I didn't fail as badly as I thought. It is the right decision, to accept this position and take on some new challenges.

It reminded me of my black belt grading. Except that I really wanted to pass. I had a lot of stress leading up to it, but I practiced hard, and lived and breathed Kung Fu. (Still do). I remember thinking that no matter what happened I knew I did my best, and that if my best wasn't good enough, I would have to practice harder for the next time. But I did pass. And it's an experience I will never forget.

 

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Self defence

What is self defence? Is it the ability to fight back when you need to? Is it the ability to deflect a situation that has the potential to get ugly? Is it eating right, and taking care of your body and your mind?

I think its all these things. But I think what we tend to forget, is that it's best not to get into a bad situation in the first place. Walking alone at night in a back alley, or on a deserted street is not a good idea. It might seem like a good idea at first glance, since there isn't anyone around to hurt you. But if you think about it deeper, there won't be anyone around to hear you scream, or save you.

Travel in packs, take the busy street home, have a charged cell phone. Look at suspicious people in the eye, letting them know you see them. Try to stay calm, and make as much noise as you have to.

Today, I witnessed an accident, but the guy who got hit, was in an extreme rage. He scared me, and what someone can do to a person in that state scares me more. So I left, as there was at least one person among many who witnessed it who got out to assist. I felt a lot of guilt for leaving a scene, but if I don't feel safe, chances are high that I'm not. I have to take care of myself in order to take care of my family. And that means avoiding situations that could be dangerous.

That was my first line of self defence today.

 

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Oh, radishes...

I have been thinking about where my Kung fu is going lately, and I think it's going in a good direction. Maybe not where it could be though. We talk about not comparing ourselves to others, as each of us is on a unique journey. But it's hard not to sometimes when others are watching, and you are very aware of your weaknesses.

 

My journey this year has been more internal then external. My focus and growth has involved the exploration of my chi, and I feel I have grown in this respect. I still have a very long path in front of me though, as there is still so much to learn and understand.

 

I know a few of my forms are rustler than they should be, and I was a bit embarrassed about it on Friday night. But, I guess that's the kick in the pants then! Time to practice those.

 

 

 

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Untitled

It's been a while since I felt inspired with teaching. I'm not saying that I lost my passion, but rather wasn't experiencing much creativity. I do know however, that by staying the course, eventually creativity will find me again. Especially when I am not looking for it.

 

I was online a few days ago, looking for a specific piece of equipment that I would love to have for the Lil Leopards class. And on this search, creativity found me. I came up with a couple of new activities, however I am not sure how well they will work out yet. But that's the exciting part - trying them out, and seeing how the kids react. Let's see how it goes!

 

 

 

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They don't write themselves

It's so easy to miss a blog day, because once you miss the first opportunity, the rest just keep slipping by. That's where I find myself today. I had a migraine on Sunday so writing was out, but I figured that I would just write on Monday. Well, it's Wednesday and I am only now sitting down. Silly me.

 

Boot camp was great. A big thank you to Sifu T. Playter for covering the Lil Leopards for me, so I could attend. It meant a lot.

 

It was great to see so many enthusiastic faces on Saturday. There was a lot of positive energy, and it is very contagious. I am looking forward to today too, for those reasons. See you all out there!

 

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Father's Day

 

Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there. I know a few great ones, and I had the pleasure of spending time with them today. Know you are appreciated and loved without measure.

 

 

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Tai Chi Tuesday

 

I had a really great experience today. I was outside in a field close to work, doing Tai Chi before lunch, and I could really feel a connection to the earth. The warm breeze seemed to energize me more, and it just felt good. It's hard to put into words, so I a not sure I can really express my experience.

 

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A truckload that doesn’t make sense

 

I am feeling a lot of stress and anxiety over an interview tomorrow. It’s been building since I got the notice last week Tuesday, and it really is just ridiculous.

I don’t need the job. In fact I don’t really want it either. So why am I doing this to myself? Basically, stripped down it is about experience and going beyond my limits. I am currently acting in the job, which pays a little bit better than my regular position, so I have some information to go in with. I believe that I need to do what I enjoy which is my normal job, so really this acting position is nothing more than a little bit extra money and different experience. If offered the job, I will more than likely not take it, as it just isn’t for me.

So why am I all stressed out and anxious then? I am going off of my last interview 10 years ago, which was absolutely horrible. And I have been remembering it with a lot of clarity. It’s tempting to cancel it, but I have a few people who have spent time with me to help me prepare. I can’t let them down. I need to do this interview, so that if I am ever in the position of having to find another job, I won’t be going in as cold. I need to do this interview to overcome this stress and anxiety. I am a martial artist – I got this, right?

 

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Numbers

I haven't added up my numbers in a while to see where I am at, and I managed to sit down tonight to do it. I definitely need to stay on top of this, as I am not where I thought I would be. The Pandamonium helped a little with my forms, but I can now see the holes not my training. Time to fill them! I do recognize that sometimes we will fall behind, but the key is see it, and then do something about it.

 

Posted with Blogsy