Mental Health

Something I have thought about a lot since the pandemic took hold, was that we need to make sure we are taking care of our mental health. It’s important that we take a few minutes everyday to do something for just ourselves. It might be a few minutes to focus on Kung Fu, or a walk outside, or just sitting outside in the sun.

I have tried to apply this to myself as best as I have been able to, and this morning I got to thinking about a strategy that I have employed for many, many years. While thinking about it today, I made the connection that this is something that being in the I Ho Chuan taught me unbeknownst to me. I’d like to share this with you.

It requires you to break down things into small bite size pieces. 50,000 pushups is a daunting task until you break it down into daily requirements, and then it’s even easier once you look at how many sets of 25 you have to do in a day. Suddenly it’s that much easier to accomplish. I’ll use my process from when I worked for the government, as I think it’ll illustrate my point the best.

I would wake up with my alarm and not feel I had the mental strength to face the day. But, my kids still had to go to school. So I would get up, and while I was getting the kids out the door, I would tell myself to just get dressed at least. I can let myself go back to bed once the kids are out the door. Then once they were out the door, I would challenge myself to at least go to work since I was already dressed. I could change my mind when I got there. Once I would get there, I would again challenge myself to just get through a couple of hours. Then my next goal was lunch, then by the time that passed staying was easier, and got easier as finishing the day approached.

The strategy is simply setting small goals, and as we know, small things do add up to big things. And I think we need to apply this mindset more now than ever. When things seem overwhelming, just stop and break things down into bite size pieces.

Air Hugs!

Listening

How often do you listen with your whole self? Listening with your body - you’re still, not fidgety. Listening without judgement - are you making faces during the conversation? Are you getting your back arched? Feathers ruffled? Listening with your eyes as well as your ears - are you noticing the body language used? Listening while trying to hurry the conversation along? Are you finishing sentences for the other person?
I know that I have done all of these. My worst ones though are finishing others’ sentences and making premature judgements. This is something I have been working on for a long time. And I think that for the most part I do ok, but if I am not mindful of listening, if I am not aware of where my mental state is, I too easily fall into my old habits. Therefore not a very good listener.
I bring this up as it’s something I think we all have to work on, one way or another. We are spending more time with our families and I think it’s easy to let true listening slide. And with Kung Fu, if we aren’t really present in our listening we just might miss a gem, some key piece of information that could possibly transform us. You just never know.

Looking forward

It’s best to look forward, not behind you. Your journey is in front of you, and while you may stand still sometimes, or maybe even take a step back, keep your eyes in forward. Learn from what’s behind you, and apply that to the path in front. Look to each side, and see who is there with you. Your mentors, your peers, your loved ones. Without them, the path forward is a difficult journey. They are there to support you, encourage you, teach you. They are there to help pick you up when you fall, to run alongside you, and remind you of why you are here. Your blood, sweat and tears are not for nothing. This is what makes it all worth it. Knowing that you have gone all in, and earned everything. There is more value in something that you, yourself have worked hard for. Look beside you again, and see who you can help. We are all together, and we may sometimes have to ask for help, for a gentle nudge, or to help pick you up. We all have something to give.

Routine

I think the hardest part of being at home all the time, is not having the same routine. Although, our dog does help with that - he has a schedule and likes very much that we stick to it. He has been getting me out of bed earlier to feed him, and that’s a good thing. But the challenge is where to fit in our Kung Fu when we used to go to the Kwoon for classes. This is where I need to sit and build a routine. I am getting my kilometres in (thanks Bark Lee!) but that’s the most consistent thing I have. But...there are many times throughout the day, that I can take 5 minutes and can some reps in. The key, I think is just to try to stay mindful of where I am and what I am doing.

You are important

“If you could only sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to the people you at never even dream of. There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person.” - Fred Rogers -

I was thinking about the one on ones that I have had with students, and this quote stuck with me. Teaching a class online with a group works, but there a sense of intimacy that is lost. These one on ones give me as an instructor, the opportunity to connect on a individual basis. I have really missed that. But we are lucky, that we have the technology and the privilege to be able to continue on. To work from home, to learn from home.

As a student, I am struggling a bit. My focus is mostly on teaching right now, and so my numbers are suffering. So what do I do? I recognize this, then make a plan to move forward and get things done

Smile

Today, just before I met with my one on one meetings outside on the deck, I took a moment. And in that moment, I didn’t think. I just closed my eyes, and felt the warmth of the sun on my face. I always feel the most at peace when I take those moments. Just a deep breath, and the warm light on me.

I find that while I am getting used to the isolating, I still feel stress, and often feel overwhelmed. But it’s these moments that re-ground me and allow me to carry on. I am grateful for this.

I am grateful that we can all still train together while still far apart. I am grateful that we are on this journey together. And I have hope that we will pull through together.

I’m Waving!

Yes I am. From back here. Yes, you’re going to have to turn around to see me as I’m straggling a little.

I’m a little behind in my requirements, some more than others. But I am still moving forward, not quitting. My training is more cerebral right now, with keeping the classes on line in the forefront. I struggle some days, but not every day and that’s a blessing. I have lots to keep me engaged, which does help in propelling me forward.

Thank you team, for being so awesome, and for waving back!